Best status updates
Statuses
New statuses
Best statuses
Most liked
Just liked
- Page 53
I ♥ my dad
A brunette goes to the doctor, and says, "Doctor I'm hurting all over my body." "That's odd", replied the doctor, "Show me what you mean" So the girl takes her finger and pokes her elbow, and screams in pain. She touches her knee and cries in agony and so on. The doctor says, "You're not a natural brunette are you?" "No I'm a blonde", she replies. "I thought so.... your finger is broken.", replies the doctor.
Grandpa: When i was your age my momma would send me down to the store with $1 and I would come back with 5 bags of potatoes 2 loaves of bread, 3 bottles of milk a box of tea and 6 eggs but you cant do that these days too many stupid security cameras.
Lost your pen = no pen. No pen = no notes. No notes = no study. No study = fail. Fail = no diploma. No diploma = no work. No work = no money. No money = no food. No food = you get skinny. Skinny = then you get ugly. Ugly = no lover. No lover = no marriage
"I had a dream about you" "Awwww" "Yeah, we f**ked "
Hanging out with Jesus to save money on wine
Had a dream I was a king. Woke up, still king.
No calls, no texts, nothing but i'm still here thinking about you like mad
I'm Real Girl! No fake Tan, No fake Boobs, No face splattered in make up.
A man in the kitchen is sexy
Page:
<<
<
50
51
52
53
54
55
56
>
>>