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Best Facebook status updates - Page 44

I hate it when my parents don't answer their phone but get mad when I don't answer mine.I hate it when my parents don't answer their phone but get mad when I don't answer mine.
How do you make your wife scream for an hour after sex? Wipe your d*ck on the curtains. How do you make a woman scream twice? F**k her in the a*s, then wipe your d*ck on the drapes.How do you make your wife scream for an hour after sex? Wipe your d*ck on the curtains. How do you make a woman scream twice? F**k her in the a*s, then wipe your d*ck on the drapes.
Meowing at cats until they meow backMeowing at cats until they meow back
"I would break my Xbox for you." Something every girl dreams of hearing."I would break my Xbox for you." Something every girl dreams of hearing.
You're a shadow until you realize: It's only you that can set you free! :))You're a shadow until you realize: It's only you that can set you free! :))
I don't have time to study, I'm a NinjaI don't have time to study, I'm a Ninja
Love is a not a losing game - if you know how to play it well;)Love is a not a losing game - if you know how to play it well;)
I want to try the water attraction in the Coca-Cola summer commercial 2011I want to try the water attraction in the Coca-Cola summer commercial 2011
At times I feel that waiting for the right person in life is like waiting for boat at the airport. =D♥At times I feel that waiting for the right person in life is like waiting for boat at the airport. =D♥
My next house will have no kitchen – just vending machines and an extremely large trash can.My next house will have no kitchen – just vending machines and an extremely large trash can.
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