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Best Facebook status updates - Friday - Page 56
No calls, no texts, nothing but i'm still here thinking about you like mad
Hanging out with Jesus to save money on wine
Lost your pen = no pen. No pen = no notes. No notes = no study. No study = fail. Fail = no diploma. No diploma = no work. No work = no money. No money = no food. No food = you get skinny. Skinny = then you get ugly. Ugly = no lover. No lover = no marriage
Katy Perry's living her Teenage Dream... Lady Gaga's ignoring her Telephone... Travie McCoy's is a Billionaire... While Justin Bieber is having a Baby.
Grandpa: When i was your age my momma would send me down to the store with $1 and I would come back with 5 bags of potatoes 2 loaves of bread, 3 bottles of milk a box of tea and 6 eggs but you cant do that these days too many stupid security cameras.
A brunette goes to the doctor, and says, "Doctor I'm hurting all over my body." "That's odd", replied the doctor, "Show me what you mean" So the girl takes her finger and pokes her elbow, and screams in pain. She touches her knee and cries in agony and so on. The doctor says, "You're not a natural brunette are you?" "No I'm a blonde", she replies. "I thought so.... your finger is broken.", replies the doctor.
I manage to get bored on facebook in ten minutes, but still spend at least three hours on it
The awkward moment in cla*s when you stick your hand up and forget what you were going to say
Hope is the most exciting thing in life and if you honestly believe that love is out there, it will come. And even if it doesn't come straight away there is still that chance all through your life that it will.
Sitting down in the shower when you cba standing..
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