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Best Facebook status updates - Last Week - Page 114

Shooting your gf because she left the kitchen without permissionShooting your gf because she left the kitchen without permission
Feeling lazier than the guy who drew the Japanese flag.Feeling lazier than the guy who drew the Japanese flag.
"Does this dress make me look fat?" ... "No, your fat makes you look fat.""Does this dress make me look fat?" ... "No, your fat makes you look fat."
Not texting back for 3 hours because you're a hard to get bastardNot texting back for 3 hours because you're a hard to get bastard
‎7.12 am OMG! im late again muuuuuuuuuuuum ?? why didn't you wake me up ? -.- mum: I did. 3 times and each time you told me that you were getting up right way ^.- and you belived me mum?!? -.-'‎7.12 am OMG! im late again muuuuuuuuuuuum ?? why didn't you wake me up ? -.- mum: I did. 3 times and each time you told me that you were getting up right way ^.- and you belived me mum?!? -.-'
When life is hard, I take a nap.When life is hard, I take a nap.
Look at your status, now back to mine, now back at yours, now back at mine. Sadly, yours isn’t mine. But if you stopped posting about the other things and made this your status, yours could be like mine. Look down, back up. Where are you? You’re on Facebook, reading the status your status could be like. I’m on a computer.Look at your status, now back to mine, now back at yours, now back at mine. Sadly, yours isn’t mine. But if you stopped posting about the other things and made this your status, yours could be like mine. Look down, back up. Where are you? You’re on Facebook, reading the status your status could be like. I’m on a computer.
Being inappropriately drunk at low-key family gatheringsBeing inappropriately drunk at low-key family gatherings
When everyone is in a relationship, and you're like lol where are my catsWhen everyone is in a relationship, and you're like lol where are my cats
Not telling your parents about the nice man who gives you candy in his van.Not telling your parents about the nice man who gives you candy in his van.
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