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Best Facebook status updates - Saturday - Page 115
Those moods where you just want to cuddle up to someone and fall asleep
I know a bunch of random usless facts that will get me nowhere in life.
"I got a ride Mom." "With who?" "I don't know but they have candy."
Doing whatever the f**k you want, because it's your life and no one else's
Crying after sex because you're sick of women using you for your hot body.
Giving your friend the last chip so they have to deal with the rubbish
Ohe satisfaction of sleeping in your own bed after being away for so long.
Police call it "Drunk and Disorderly" we call it "having a good night"
You may wear the pants in this relationship, but i control the zipper. (:
Blanket on - too hot, blanket off - too cold, stick leg out - Demon eats you
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