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Best Facebook status updates - This Week - Page 74
Not wearing condoms because the world needs more people like you
My neighbour is stalking me, he Googled me, I saw it through my telescope.
"Does this dress make me look fat?" ... "No, your fat makes you look fat."
Not texting back for 3 hours because you're a hard to get bastard
7.12 am OMG! im late again muuuuuuuuuuuum ?? why didn't you wake me up ? -.- mum: I did. 3 times and each time you told me that you were getting up right way ^.- and you belived me mum?!? -.-'
Sitting on your floor in your undies. Not knowing what to wear.
Having too much month left at the end of the money.
all we need is diet.
Buying a 2013 diary coz youre an optimistic bastard.
I named my hard drive "That Thang" so once a month my computer asks me if I want to back That Thang up.
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