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Best Facebook status updates - Wednesday - Page 61

I wonder how police on bikes arrest people. "Alright, get in the basket!"I wonder how police on bikes arrest people. "Alright, get in the basket!"
FREAKING OUT WHEN SOMETHING TOUCHES YOUR FOOT IN THE SEA!!FREAKING OUT WHEN SOMETHING TOUCHES YOUR FOOT IN THE SEA!!
You miss the days when you could safely push someone into a pool, now you gotta worry about the iPod, the cellphone, maybe a PSP, you push someone in, it costs you $939.You miss the days when you could safely push someone into a pool, now you gotta worry about the iPod, the cellphone, maybe a PSP, you push someone in, it costs you $939.
You want a perfect girl?.. Go buy a Barbie.You want a perfect girl?.. Go buy a Barbie.
I'm fluent in three languages: English, Sarcasm, and Profanity.I'm fluent in three languages: English, Sarcasm, and Profanity.
My ex? Yeah, I’d still hit that. Only this time, it’d be with a car or a baseball bat... My ex? Yeah, I’d still hit that. Only this time, it’d be with a car or a baseball bat...
I still remember the first time I talked, met, and hung out with you (:I still remember the first time I talked, met, and hung out with you (:
"why didn't u answer my call?!" "Cuz i was dancing to my ringtone!""why didn't u answer my call?!" "Cuz i was dancing to my ringtone!"
Sometimes the only way to hide the pain is to smile.Sometimes the only way to hide the pain is to smile.
Don't you hate it when you just get comfortable and you realize that the remote is just out of reach?Don't you hate it when you just get comfortable and you realize that the remote is just out of reach?
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