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Best Facebook status updates - January - Page 71

I want someone to love me for me, not my mad sex skills.I want someone to love me for me, not my mad sex skills.
I dont have bad handwriting. I have my own Font.I dont have bad handwriting. I have my own Font.
"You’re too gorgeous to be single" - "You’re too ugly to be flirting with me""You’re too gorgeous to be single" - "You’re too ugly to be flirting with me"
Oh great now that song's stuck in my head all day and i only know 1 line.Oh great now that song's stuck in my head all day and i only know 1 line.
LIKE THIS if you know SOMEONE who needs a smack with a shovelLIKE THIS if you know SOMEONE who needs a smack with a shovel
Licking your food so you dont have to share.Licking your food so you dont have to share.
Watching a romantic movie and accepting the fact you're going to die alone.Watching a romantic movie and accepting the fact you're going to die alone.
Waving the offside flag when your Girlfriend leaves the kitchenWaving the offside flag when your Girlfriend leaves the kitchen
Getting drunk and selling your friends for cigarettes.Getting drunk and selling your friends for cigarettes.
Sitting on the couch and doing nothingSitting on the couch and doing nothing
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