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Best Facebook status updates - January - Page 82

"You’re too gorgeous to be single" - "You’re too ugly to be flirting with me""You’re too gorgeous to be single" - "You’re too ugly to be flirting with me"
When I'm bored I stand in the garden and pretend to be a carrot.When I'm bored I stand in the garden and pretend to be a carrot.
"That's it, I'm logging out now. Oooooooh look, a notification""That's it, I'm logging out now. Oooooooh look, a notification"
When i see your face theres not a thing i would change LOL JK just the direction im walkingWhen i see your face theres not a thing i would change LOL JK just the direction im walking
LIKE THIS if you know SOMEONE who needs a smack with a shovelLIKE THIS if you know SOMEONE who needs a smack with a shovel
nobody bring me DOWN!nobody bring me DOWN!
High Heels ♥High Heels ♥
Texting your mate after a night out to make sure they're aliveTexting your mate after a night out to make sure they're alive
Sending good morning texts to yourself because no one loves you.Sending good morning texts to yourself because no one loves you.
Waving the offside flag when your Girlfriend leaves the kitchenWaving the offside flag when your Girlfriend leaves the kitchen
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