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Best Facebook status updates - Saturday - Page 31
Dont Be In A Relationship If You're Going To Act Single
Our small, stupid conversations mean more to me than you'll ever know
When I'm bored I stand in the garden and pretend to be a carrot.
Dear 4th Grader, On Facebook, your relationship status is 'It's complicated'. What he do? Steal your animal crackers? Sincerely, Your Mother.
LIKE THIS if you know SOMEONE who needs a smack with a shovel
Standing in the kitchen pretending to be a woman, making woman noises
Getting a sticker at the dentist because you're a brave bastard.
Looking at % instead of price when buying alcohol.
Ohe satisfaction of sleeping in your own bed after being away for so long.
Police call it "Drunk and Disorderly" we call it "having a good night"
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