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Best Facebook status updates - Last Week - Page 100
You miss the days when you could safely push someone into a pool, now you gotta worry about the iPod, the cellphone, maybe a PSP, you push someone in, it costs you $939.
You want a perfect girl?.. Go buy a Barbie.
I'm fluent in three languages: English, Sarcasm, and Profanity.
Love is like quicksand, the deeper and deeper you fall in... the harder it is to get out.
"why didn't u answer my call?!" "Cuz i was dancing to my ringtone!"
Sometimes the only way to hide the pain is to smile.
Ale-alejandro, Papa-Paparazzi, Po-po-po-pokerface, Te-te-te-telephone... Hmmmm am I the only one that thinks Lady Gaga might have a speech impediment?
I hate people who chew gum like retarded cows
I AM THE COOLER SIBLING :)
I Hate It When I Do something Amazing And No One Sees it
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