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Best Facebook status updates - Tuesday - Page 35

Take me drunk, I'm home!Take me drunk, I'm home!
Please my dear Immature...GROW UP!!!Please my dear Immature...GROW UP!!!
im so sexyim so sexy
Sorry for trusting you, it won't happen again.Sorry for trusting you, it won't happen again.
I'm on a vodka diet, so far lost 3 days two mates one dog and my house keysI'm on a vodka diet, so far lost 3 days two mates one dog and my house keys
You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.
Turning your porn up really loud so your neighbors think you have a girlfriend/boyfriend.Turning your porn up really loud so your neighbors think you have a girlfriend/boyfriend.
That awkward moment when Lady Gaga doesn’t know what to wear for Halloween.That awkward moment when Lady Gaga doesn’t know what to wear for Halloween.
Calling your girlfriend beautiful, because you forgot her name.Calling your girlfriend beautiful, because you forgot her name.
Fell in love with a stranger on public transport. Wait 'til he comes to you or go to him? Go to him or he'll be out of your sights and life. Life, as we know it, IS TOO F****** SHORT.Fell in love with a stranger on public transport. Wait 'til he comes to you or go to him? Go to him or he'll be out of your sights and life. Life, as we know it, IS TOO F****** SHORT.
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